Faux Quixote

“Dancer from the Dance” by Andrew Holleran

I finished this book about a month ago, but I haven’t had a chance to review it until now. I liked this book as much as I’ve liked a book in quite a long time. It tells the story of the still-underground but burgeoning gay circuit scene in New York City and Fire Island during the post-Stonewall, pre-AIDS era. The time and place described is exciting, lustful and at times comical, but ultimately reveals itself with a sort of hollow hopelessness. Basically, it asserts that gay life was either one-dimensional (sex) or two-dimensional (sex and dance) for these forebears who lived at a time progressive enough to have community but still too repressed for real opportunity.

The thing that stuck with me the most were the undeniable parallels to the gay scene we live in today. As the the author described the parties, the participants and the hopes (and delusions) of the generation, I was reminded of places, parties and even specific people that I’ve encountered in the past five years alone. While the book reflects only a small segment of the gay population living in the United States or even New York City at the time, I couldn’t help but think, “Holy shit, we haven’t really progressed that far.” Of course, in certain ways, we absolutely have. But I recommend this book to any gay man who has ever been to a circuit party (or gay club, for that matter). Whether you enjoyed yourself or hated your experience, live for them or despise them, consider them an outlet or a trap (or maybe a little bit of both), this books reminds us that we’re still dealing with some of the same internal shit we did 40 years ago in pursuit of the very same thrills. Is that bad? Is it intrinsically gay? It’s tough to say, but important to consider.